Flashfloods In Bathtubs

Dusting off the cobwebs

#bass #guitar #purple #bluerock #blink182 #blink #carousel #scrappy #needswork #beard #specky #glasses #piercings #boywithpiercings #nerd #geek #etnies #mysaturdaynight #looser

mercuryolie:

Pokémon in the real world (x)

lacigreen:

queeravenger:

wobbuffette:

cracked-dot-com-official:

killbenedictcumberbatch:

guyfitblr:

And finally someone said it

nobody’s fucking stopping you from putting on some foundation dude you can put it on and it’s discrete and other straight guys won’t be able to tell and it does wonders. nobody’s stopping you from moisturizing or even putting on the lightest bits of concealer. don’t worry, other straight men can’t tell

Also there’s less pressure for men to be attractive and more pressure on women to see past men’s looks for their personalities, like look how many movies star average/ugly dudes who still score modelesque girls.

step 1: create unrealistic, unattainable standards of beauty for women

step 2: build a multi-billion dollar beauty industry to sell women makeup, tell them they are worthless without it

step 3: mock and vilify women who wear makeup as vain and fake, mock and vilify women who don’t wear makeup as ugly

step 4: code makeup as exclusively feminine, make the feminine shameful, shame any and all men perceived as feminine

step 5: complain that you can’t wear makeup

all that commentary

Dear tumblr,

This is a perfect example of “if your a straight white guy and in your twenties then you are SATAN!”
Come on guy, he’s clearly making a joke at the expense of guys and we are all getting way to hung up on gender politics to just take a second to laugh at ourselves.

Yeah I know the responses I’ll get to saying that:

"Straight white guys don’t get discriminated against so there should be a place where they get to feel what it’s like"

…and that is a valid point if every TSSWG (twenty something straight whit guy, yeah I’m abbreviating now) was a hate breeding arsehole. But my experience of TSSWG on tumblr are, in general, good old fashion lefties who are pro equality and equal rights, pro choice and pro gay marriage. We believe every thing you do but we were born with a penis.
Isn’t hating us for that the exact same thing every one is fighting against?
Rather than fighting hate with hate can’t we all just rise above it? Lead by example? Come on Internet we are better than this

But hey this is getting off topic, the point is lighten up a little and see the humour in life. There are times to speak out about sexism or discrimination but this? This is just an amusing observation about guys being ugly and stupid :)

Stay classy tumblr

celestial-elixir:

THE MAN OF SPIDERS

chubbifoxxi:

who-lligan:

So I just had the shit creeped out of me.

I’m not someone who believes in ghosts, but I was sitting in my room, alone and in the dark, and I heard the strings of my violin being softly plucked. 

My violin is hanging on the wall several feet away. 

So I gathered my courage, grabbed my phone, and used the camera light to investigate. 

And found this.

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A goddamn spider was playing my violin. Not even joking. The little shit.

thats worse than a ghost

thefrogman:

On this day in 1492, George Washington crossed the Atlantic Ocean in three mighty ships… the Nina, the Piñata and the Santa Claus.
Washington and the other Americans were fleeing the evil Britons. The Britons believed in taxation without representation and back then there was no TurboTax, so that was a really big deal. 
To infuriate the Britons, Washington decided to waste a bunch of their tea, dumping it into the sea. The Britons jumped in after the tea, trying to drink it as they swam around in it. All you could see were Englishman’s pinkies sticking up through the water.
One must always extend his pinky whilst drinking tea. 
This meant war. 
The Americans and the Britons lined up on two sides of a field. They raised their muskets and began firing at one another. At no point did anyone think to hide behind a rock or a tree. After hours of firing their weapons and making no attempts to dodge the deadly projectiles, the only two men left standing were George Washington and King Leopold Womplebottom the 8th.
They were both out of ammunition so they charged at one another with their bayonets raised. Before they could reach each other, Jesus Christ descended from the heavens and turned their weapons into armadillos. He liked changing things into armadillos because their name sounds so much like “arm dildos” and it makes him giggle. 
The Lord asked, “Why are you two fighting this battle?”
George replied, “He taxed us a bunch and took away our freeeeeeedom.”
King Womplebottom replied, “He wasted tea and I’m pretty sure his teeth are made of wood. And that’s creepy.” 
Jesus shook his head and said, “The wooden teeth are a myth. You really need to look things up on Ye Olde Snopes before you start spouting them off as facts.”
Jesus decided enough was enough. He told the King to return to England and leave the Americans alone. He told George Washington to declare independence and lead this new nation. Jesus then ascended toward the heavens with his arms raised and with a booming, echoed voice he said…
"Arrrrrmmmm dildos!"
The King returned to England as instructed and George gathered his most patriotic friends inside the Liberty Bell in Philadelphia. (It’s bigger on the inside.) They wrote up a document declaring independence from the tyranny of Great Britain. His friend John Hancock signed his name really big and George was like, “Dude, we all gotta sign this shit and we only have one piece of paper. Not cool.”
Then they attached fireworks to an eagle, it flew high above the Liberty Bell, and exploded in a feathery death of absolute freedom.
And America lived happily ever after.

thefrogman:

On this day in 1492, George Washington crossed the Atlantic Ocean in three mighty ships… the Nina, the Piñata and the Santa Claus.

Washington and the other Americans were fleeing the evil Britons. The Britons believed in taxation without representation and back then there was no TurboTax, so that was a really big deal. 

To infuriate the Britons, Washington decided to waste a bunch of their tea, dumping it into the sea. The Britons jumped in after the tea, trying to drink it as they swam around in it. All you could see were Englishman’s pinkies sticking up through the water.

One must always extend his pinky whilst drinking tea. 

This meant war. 

The Americans and the Britons lined up on two sides of a field. They raised their muskets and began firing at one another. At no point did anyone think to hide behind a rock or a tree. After hours of firing their weapons and making no attempts to dodge the deadly projectiles, the only two men left standing were George Washington and King Leopold Womplebottom the 8th.

They were both out of ammunition so they charged at one another with their bayonets raised. Before they could reach each other, Jesus Christ descended from the heavens and turned their weapons into armadillos. He liked changing things into armadillos because their name sounds so much like “arm dildos” and it makes him giggle. 

The Lord asked, “Why are you two fighting this battle?”

George replied, “He taxed us a bunch and took away our freeeeeeedom.”

King Womplebottom replied, “He wasted tea and I’m pretty sure his teeth are made of wood. And that’s creepy.” 

Jesus shook his head and said, “The wooden teeth are a myth. You really need to look things up on Ye Olde Snopes before you start spouting them off as facts.”

Jesus decided enough was enough. He told the King to return to England and leave the Americans alone. He told George Washington to declare independence and lead this new nation. Jesus then ascended toward the heavens with his arms raised and with a booming, echoed voice he said…

"Arrrrrmmmm dildos!"

The King returned to England as instructed and George gathered his most patriotic friends inside the Liberty Bell in Philadelphia. (It’s bigger on the inside.) They wrote up a document declaring independence from the tyranny of Great Britain. His friend John Hancock signed his name really big and George was like, “Dude, we all gotta sign this shit and we only have one piece of paper. Not cool.”

Then they attached fireworks to an eagle, it flew high above the Liberty Bell, and exploded in a feathery death of absolute freedom.

And America lived happily ever after.

#Tired today

#sleepy #selfie #ironfist #ginger #beard #glasses #specky #nochin #spikey

#Tired today

#sleepy #selfie #ironfist #ginger #beard #glasses #specky #nochin #spikey

This maybe the best album I’ve been introduced to this year. Owned it 6 hours and already played it through 4 times. 

#maskedintruder #poppunkrock #music #ipod #rock #punk #band #playitloud

This maybe the best album I’ve been introduced to this year. Owned it 6 hours and already played it through 4 times.

#maskedintruder #poppunkrock #music #ipod #rock #punk #band #playitloud

Me and my new girlfriend. Wine. 


#wine #boywithpiercings #ginger #lonely #zinfandel #drunk #girlfriend #sad #needstogetalife

Me and my new girlfriend. Wine.


#wine #boywithpiercings #ginger #lonely #zinfandel #drunk #girlfriend #sad #needstogetalife

Can’t sleep 


#sleep #selfie #blackandwhite #awake #tired #moody

Can’t sleep


#sleep #selfie #blackandwhite #awake #tired #moody

So…

I fell apart tonight and lost my temper. I don’t do that. Ever. But tonight was an exception. I didn’t shout or scream, I just let my feelings (how ever unreasonable they seem at first glance) be known.

In all honestly though. I’m not wrong. I’m biblically pissed and I have every right to be.

ramennochibi:

phinflynn:

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"Ah, Perry the platypus!"

image

"What an unexpected -"

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"WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!"

image

"You’re trapped!"

image

"By societal convention!"

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"Look! We’re in a fine dining environment. Everyone knows not to throw a scene in a fancy restaurant!”

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"That’s right. You’re trapped. Sit down."

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the writers for this show deserve more credit man

Today comedy died. 

Tonight we watch bottom and eat pie.

Today comedy died.

Tonight we watch bottom and eat pie.

Last week, I may have gone too far. I’ll explain it quickly. Basically, I found out where he gets his clothes dry-cleaned. Custom ordered the same suit, made with tear-away velcro. And… you can fill in the rest.